Ready to Retire? Think again!

"Working in the DC Nightlife scene is not an easy job.  It's time we start planning our retirement"!

Two weeks ago, I flew off to central Florida to spend time at the family gathering.  The town is a gated community of about 60,000 people.  Cars are definitely allowed, but it is a golf cart community so you can literally go anywhere and everywhere in your golf cart (even drive thru fast food), which of course I took full advantage of.   I soon realized I was about 40 years younger than the majority (Florida, big surprise), which got me thinking about retirement.  

So since people back in the day use to die at 65, I guess the age to retire was probably 40 or so.  Now that people live much longer lives, retirement age is on the rise.  I went to the government website to fully grasp the concept.  This is what I found: 

If you were born in 1942 or earlier, you are already eligible for your full Social Security benefit. If you were born from 1943 to 1960, the age at which full retirement benefits are payable increases gradually to age 67.

So who knows when our generation will be able to retire, if ever.  Seeing as I feel I’m ready to retire already, I suppose I have a long way to go, which got me thinking… Like most things in life, how can you generalize just one age to allow retirement (if you want to collect from social security)?  Don’t different jobs have different shelf lives and put different levels of strain on oneself, thus speeding up the aging process?

I propose a new idea.  Since I’m here in DC this would be the place to do it right?  For example, those of us working in the DC nightlife industry are probably aging at a rapid pace.  Take into account all those late nights for starters.   Ultrabar for example is open at 9pm on the weekends for an hour open bar and closes at 3am.  Also, the loud music, though we all love the variety of anything from house, hip-hop, top 40 and Latin tunes, I can already attest I’m going deaf.  Then there is the obvious drinking which goes for you club goers as well.  I know we make it tempting at Ultrabar with all the drink specials like $4 Dos Equis, $3 Guiness, $6 Café Patron, $6 Rum and Coke, and $150 Kettle One bottles.  Then lifting heavy beer and liquor cases and basically standing for a living. 

I’m in no way saying it’s the hardest job, but there should be some scale on how much your job decreases your life span to coordinate with an appropriate retirement age.  For example, think about miners, those guys in West Virginia are really speeding up the time of death so maybe they should be allowed to retire at 25, give or take.  On the opposite spectrum, those who sit at a desk all day, they could be good to go until 80 years old at least, sit and be fit, how much strain could that really place on anyone?

I will be looking into this further and who knows, maybe in one or two years I’ll be relaxing in Florida, wearing my Talbots and Crocs and getting into a competitive shuffle board competition.  Until I work this out with Obama, you can find me at Ultrabar on the weekends.  Check the websites for Ultrabar and Panorama Productions and get info on upcoming events, admission discounts and bottle/drink specials.

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